Hmmm

I am in the thick of deciding between IVF or adoption....AGAIN!! I can't sleep because I just want clarity on the situation. I know only God has the ultimate answer but I do not know what that is. I get different feedback from friends about waiting, not the right timing etc...but it's been a little over 8 years now and I grow more and more gloomy by the day. It's hard to watch days, months and years go by like this. Sometimes I start secluding myself, sometimes I lash out at others..it's such a mess. I wish I had someone to talk to that could truly understand my pain and not feed me rainbows and sunshine. WAH