3-15

Obviously I haven't written in awhile; it's a monday night or should i say early tuesday (1230am). I have been getting a little relief with the new med, but the success is decreasing by the day. Why does that happen?
I went to a new psychologist last week and she was a little strange. She was talking about how our bodies are like computers and we have a 'restart' button we can push on our chestbone? You know our bodies have electricity running through them and relaxation tapes and breathing can heal everything. I find that hard to believe that several prescription medications have done NOTHING for me but listening to a tape is going to take all my troubles away.

I have an appointment with my doc on Thursday and I am still debating on wether I should go or not. A big part of me feels like giving up and saying to heck with all these appointments and meds...I mean after all there are lots of people in the world that do that. Then I think "what would that do to my husband" so I keep chugging along. I think I've had a least one doctor's appointment every week this year...that's crazy!

Is it silly to take a month off of EVERYTHING and let my system 'reboot' so to speak?

2-28 1230am

Haven't been able to 'write' in awhile, life has been super busy. This weekend I went to a women's conference in Vienna, VA that was awesome. It started Friday afternoon and I arrived a little tired since Thursday night I only got about 2 hours of sleep. That night I got about 3 hours and tonight, well things aren't looking so good.
I had kind of figured out that I could sleep a little better if I slept every other night, but I don't have anything to do the nights I stay awake so I try and try go to sleep. Maybe I could start to paint different rooms in my house or something? My friends don't think this sounds like such a great idea, but it might decrease some of the frustration I am feeling about all this nonsense.

2/25 @ 3am

Have a new med called sonata that was much hassle to get. Thought it worked last night because I really fell asleep fast and hard, but I think that had more to do with the fact that I didn't ever go to bed on Monday night. What to do???

2/23 7am-ish

2am Totally can't sleep. I am so tired my eyes burn but I can't turn off my brain. Think at this point I will just stay awake and make my husband breakfast tacos...he'll be so happy! Plus, he totally deserves it.

7am so I didn't go to sleep yet, I guess that means I'm just going to stay up until tonight sometime. I pray I can sleep tonight or else my doc is going to hear from me AGAIN!!! I thought about it earlier and I should have called the after hours line and left a message every hour saying "it's me, i'm still awake. thanks for not calling the pharmacy back!" Isn't hindsight 20/20?

2/22

So I called my doctor today and told her that the lunesta didn't work. She called in a script for something else that I have never heard of before. Then I go to pick it up and they said the insurance had questions and they left the doc a message this morning and never heard back from her. So needless to say, they didn't fill the script. So another sleepless night for me...and a busy day tomorrow...what a great combination. Hopefully the doc, pharmacy and insurance can get things worked out tomorrow! Please LORD!!

getting more tired

2/21 4pm

Well the Lunesta didn't work :(, I am so disappointed. I even cried a little at work today thinking about it. It did leave this disgusting taste in my mouth after I took it for about 36 hours. So I couldn't drink anything and hardly eat anything for those 36 hours. I'm back to eating and drinking, but still not sleeping. Guess I'll be calling the doc tomorrow and seeing what's next on the list.

Sadly Yours,
SR

2/20 1030pm

Had a follow-up with the doc yesterday, she actually heard what I said. Went to target and they were out of the meds my doc prescribed. So now that I went and go them filled I will try them tonight. I am officially on 'Lunesta'. Wish me sleep tonight folks!

Well obviously the meds didn't work. Here it is a little after midnight and I'm still wide awake. I thought they were supposed to work within a few minutes. Well poop! I even turned out all the lights and laid very still trying to think empty thoughts to give them the best shot. Here I thought I'd be dreaming about butterflies by now like on the commercial. A bit naive of me I know, but a girl can hope can't she? Maybe they take a week or so to 'get in your system'? We'll see.

I got a little more sleep than usual last night. I'd say I fell asleep between 1 and 2 am. I have a long day ahead of me today so I'll probably be so tired I won't know what to do with myself tonight. But then as normal, I'll lay down and be wide awake. I guess I could always resort to scrubbing my baseboards :).

Well all, I go see my doctor today and I'm going to let her know the medications she gave me last do not work. Wish me luck people.

Hello Out There

Hello People! Let me just give fair warning that my punctuation and spelling have never been my area of expertise, please extend some grace here.

I've joked about starting a blog for months now and finally jumped in with both feet, the waters chilly ;). So I've had trouble getting to sleep for years, but it's got dramatically worse a little over a year ago or so, and the doctors just can't seem to get me any help; my mistake I thought that was their job. Then again, I did read on a "medical" website last night that insomnia is NOT a disorder it is a complaint. A broken arm isn't a disorder either, but you can't live with it.

So here's what we've tried:

1. vitamins

2. a regimen

3. melatonin

4. tylenol pm (all otc pm meds)

5. ambien

6. ambien with trazadone

7. trazadone

That's pretty much all I can remember at the moment and none of it has worked for more than a week. I have to say one gets pretty loopy when it takes 5-6 hours to fall asleep and you can only sleep for 30-45 minutes at a time. I am currently blessed with a job I don't have to get out of bed early for thank God.

If anyone out there has any suggestions or experiences they'd like to share I'm listening...after all...I'll be awake!

note: fell asleep after 4am